Preheat your oven to 375°F (190°C) and line a baking sheet with parchment paper. This isn't just for easy cleanup – it prevents the peppers from sticking to the pan when the cheese inevitably oozes out a bit.
Prep your peppers by cutting them in half lengthwise and removing the seeds and membranes. Leave the stems on – they make adorable little handles for picking them up. Set aside.
Brown the sausage in a large skillet over medium heat, breaking it into small crumbles as it cooks (about 5-7 minutes). If your sausage is particularly fatty, drain off some of the excess grease, but leave a little for flavor.
Add the garlic to the cooked sausage and sauté for about 30 seconds until fragrant. Remove from heat and let cool slightly. Your kitchen already smells amazing, doesn't it?
In a mixing bowl, combine the cream cheese, parmesan, green onions, cooked sausage mixture, oregano, and red pepper flakes if using. Season with salt and pepper to taste. The mixture should be thick but spreadable.
Spoon the filling into each pepper half, mounding it slightly. Don't be stingy here – we're going for generous, indulgent stuffed peppers.
Arrange the stuffed peppers on your prepared baking sheet, filling side up. Sprinkle with a little extra parmesan cheese because, let's be real, more cheese is always the right answer.
Bake for 20-25 minutes until the peppers are tender and the tops are golden brown and slightly crispy.
Garnish with chopped parsley and serve warm. Watch them disappear faster than your motivation on a Monday morning.